Jeepers creepers, cast yer peepers at this here malarky! MALARKY

... yes, I am an unreliable narrator and you'd better believe it

My apologies for my considerable period of silence. I do that don't I: suddenly fall off of the blogging map - radio silence from Mr. DeBunkem! Well, this time I had real reasons. You see, I went for a swim in a local watering spot when I was swept up on the back of a giant sardine. Swept off and carried way out to sea where I was used as a kind of human beach ball by two frisky marine mammals. Oh, I don't blame them really - any damage they caused to my person was not done on Porpoise. These things happen.

Anyway, whilst I was being batted to-and-fro between the fishy-breathed enthusiasts, I had time to step back a little from the day-to-day hubbub... time to reflect. It was during this time that I suddenly realised that the reason that horses unsettle me is that their bodies are the hosts of the spirits of dead Nazis. Yes, that's right! Dead Nazis. They chose the horses as the perfect host, as a horse typically has an ostensibly gentle eye, and they did not want to raise suspicions. I mean, they had relocated to other kinds of hosts who had fermented a good deal of eyebrow raising (click HERE for one such instance). And that is why, when I look into the eye of a horse and I see the hateful glint of a Nazi fanatic staring back at me, I am rather freaked out to be quite honest...


So there we are... some say that DeBunkem's thoughts are actually the deranged ramblings of a senile 95 year old man with a shock of silver hair and huge leather ears... some say, that DeBunkem was knocked down by an Ice-Cream float and that you are currently reading the inner thoughts of his mind - his coma ('coma' you fool! Not 'comma'). Some say -
"Haddock tears tear my heart apart... isn't it" [Jurgen Gavin]

Perhaps we will never know. Why so? Because, my Reader, I am an unreliable narrator!

Had a conversation today which went something like this:
DeBunkem: "... to say that she's 'monsterous' is a bit harsh; I mean, she is capable of monsterous behaviour, but she is not monsterous herself."
Mrs Flaps: "No one is monsterous, even if their behaviour is."
DeBunkem: "Fascist!"
Mrs Flaps: "What! What are you talking about..."
DeBunkem: "Yeh, I see what you're saying; Hitler was okay really, it's just that he did some monsterous things..."
Mrs Flaps: "Wanker!"

And she's right - I am really.